Bonding with the baby
So much has taken place since I last posted a blog. I feel a little bad that I didn't keep up with this journal. Things have been so busy. I have spent a lot of time working on getting ready for the baby that there just wasn't time for this blog. But tonight I feel like taking the time to write something. I really wanted to have a journal to look back on during the first moments of my baby's life. Many things have happened throughout these 7 months, but I will focus more on how I am today.
Today I read baby his first book. One Fish Two Fish Red Fish Blue fish. I laid on the bed in my old room with my shirt lifted up, talking in an animated voice so that he could hear the rhymes. He moved a lot during the reading, so I hope he liked it. He moves a lot when I lay on my back. It's beautiful to see and feel him moving. He is moving even now. I spend a lot of time feeling him beneath my skin, deep within the safety of my womb. He is ever growing and getting so big!
I am so excited to meet him. After I read the book to him, I laid on my back and put some relaxing piano music on and improvised with it. He didn't move as much then, but I think he was relaxing and enjoying the music. My musical baby. I felt tears build up in my eyes for the love that builds within me for my sweet baby. He is so loved. I sent him a loving blessing and he wiggled a lot during it, so I think he must have felt my loving energy.
We have set the date and time for the baby shower, I just got a part time job at a chiropractic office as a receptionist, David is looking at flights to return, my dad compiled a list of addresses for inviting people to the baby shower and the wedding. I had a doctor's appointment yesterday and got to ask Dr. Heaps lots of questions about the birth and my birth plan. I've gone walking about 4 times out of the week, I do yoga and exercise on my exercise ball to make my body supple and ready for birthing my little bean. I meditate daily, sometimes more than once. I met with Jay and Liam today at an art market and had a wonderful time, then we went and had donuts at a donut shop nearby and I felt a bit bad for having eaten two donuts, but they were delicious, and I was happy.
I had a very good day. I made a decision to not allow bad drivers to ruin my mood while driving, and it seemed to work alright. I still got a little upset or annoyed when someone was reckless, but I let it pass quickly. There weren't too many rude people on the road today, though, so I don't feel I had to try particularly hard. I want to be as peaceful as possible for the next few months. I want to set the foundation for a healthy and happy baby. He is everything to me. I love him with all of my heart and am going to be so smitten when I actually get to hold him. Sometimes I am amazed at the depth of my emotions.
I just felt very peaceful today and not irritable in almost any way. I felt calm and relaxed, and reminded myself when I wasn't relaxed to drop my shoulders. I want to internalize peace and relaxation and share that with all around me so that I cultivate a peaceful bubble. I want others to feel happy because of my presence, and loved. I will try my hardest to be these things. I want baby to have as loving an environment as possible. It is late and I need to bathe, stretch, and then meditate. I will possibly post another blog soon.
I am proud of myself for rising above the difficult parts of life and wanting to be a better person, rather than a victim or someone who is resentful and bitter. I am proud that I still have so much love to give the world, and I have my son to thank for it. He gives me extra meaning in life. I want to be a model for him. A model of love, of kindness. Of wisdom and humility. Of curiosity and discernment. Of acceptance and peace. And I shall be these things.
Today I read baby his first book. One Fish Two Fish Red Fish Blue fish. I laid on the bed in my old room with my shirt lifted up, talking in an animated voice so that he could hear the rhymes. He moved a lot during the reading, so I hope he liked it. He moves a lot when I lay on my back. It's beautiful to see and feel him moving. He is moving even now. I spend a lot of time feeling him beneath my skin, deep within the safety of my womb. He is ever growing and getting so big!
I am so excited to meet him. After I read the book to him, I laid on my back and put some relaxing piano music on and improvised with it. He didn't move as much then, but I think he was relaxing and enjoying the music. My musical baby. I felt tears build up in my eyes for the love that builds within me for my sweet baby. He is so loved. I sent him a loving blessing and he wiggled a lot during it, so I think he must have felt my loving energy.
We have set the date and time for the baby shower, I just got a part time job at a chiropractic office as a receptionist, David is looking at flights to return, my dad compiled a list of addresses for inviting people to the baby shower and the wedding. I had a doctor's appointment yesterday and got to ask Dr. Heaps lots of questions about the birth and my birth plan. I've gone walking about 4 times out of the week, I do yoga and exercise on my exercise ball to make my body supple and ready for birthing my little bean. I meditate daily, sometimes more than once. I met with Jay and Liam today at an art market and had a wonderful time, then we went and had donuts at a donut shop nearby and I felt a bit bad for having eaten two donuts, but they were delicious, and I was happy.
I had a very good day. I made a decision to not allow bad drivers to ruin my mood while driving, and it seemed to work alright. I still got a little upset or annoyed when someone was reckless, but I let it pass quickly. There weren't too many rude people on the road today, though, so I don't feel I had to try particularly hard. I want to be as peaceful as possible for the next few months. I want to set the foundation for a healthy and happy baby. He is everything to me. I love him with all of my heart and am going to be so smitten when I actually get to hold him. Sometimes I am amazed at the depth of my emotions.
I just felt very peaceful today and not irritable in almost any way. I felt calm and relaxed, and reminded myself when I wasn't relaxed to drop my shoulders. I want to internalize peace and relaxation and share that with all around me so that I cultivate a peaceful bubble. I want others to feel happy because of my presence, and loved. I will try my hardest to be these things. I want baby to have as loving an environment as possible. It is late and I need to bathe, stretch, and then meditate. I will possibly post another blog soon.
I am proud of myself for rising above the difficult parts of life and wanting to be a better person, rather than a victim or someone who is resentful and bitter. I am proud that I still have so much love to give the world, and I have my son to thank for it. He gives me extra meaning in life. I want to be a model for him. A model of love, of kindness. Of wisdom and humility. Of curiosity and discernment. Of acceptance and peace. And I shall be these things.
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